Keeps Us Laughing

“Ok. Let’s get dressed for Thursday, no...Friday.”

Me: what did you make me?

E: a roundabout. 

Me: What flavors did you put in it?

E: flour and chocolate chips and roast beast. 

E: do you know what “actividor” means?

Me: no. 

E: king to the food. 

“Take a picture of me with my mower to send to Grandma Susan.”

Me: we forgot to give grandma Susan a bday gift because we got so sick and it took us a long time to get better. What should we get her?

Elias: a book. 

Me: a book?

E: a magazine book. 

Me: about what?

E: turkeys. 

Me: a book magazine about turkeys?!

E: that’s what she wants. 

Elias: Would you like some 

coffee? We have three kinds but I don’t have hazelnut. We have...hazelnut, powder nut mint sugar, and perfume stinky and that’s all. 

He was a podiatrist. Her foot was hurt. 

The other day we were leaving the house. Elias was extremely irritated that we had to leave and I could not figure out why. He whipped out a play phone, dialed it, and started talking very irritated to the other person. He said “I’m sorry. You can’t come over. Mommy is making us leave. You’ll have to come another day.“ When I asked who he called he said “it was Greta of course. And now she can’t come over.“

While looking over the decorated church...

Dad, I like the angel best. But who will come to judge the living and the dead?

While driving home on Christmas Eve...

We always see trees when we drive. But the Alaskans don’t see trees.

Levi is a good name for our baby because he smiles more than girls.

Elias: what school does grandpa go to?

Me: he doesn’t go to school. 

Elias: what does he do?

Me: well he’s retired so he doesn’t have to work anymore. He does help the ninjas on Thursdays though. 

Elias: yeah. And the soldiers. Do Roman soldiers have to get pokes? I don’t like pokes. 

Me: sometimes. It keeps their bodies healthy. 

Elias: are we retired from pokes? 

Me: um, for now yes.

Me: can I read the paper when you’re done?

Elias: it’s going to take me a while and a half.